Why do this? Well, as a gambler, when you're down on your luck, you need to try anything. Granted, last night we killed it and really don't need to resort to gimmicky gambling techniques. Besides, it's our blogs and your money, so fuck you!
Without further ado!
The New York Knicks @ The Oklahoma City Thunder
-9.5, 200.5
First things first, any time you can take a top 8 Western Conference team against any team from the East that doesn't have "Miami" or "Pacers" in their name, DO IT. I don't care what the spread is, just do it. My initial prediction would be to take the under and lay the points. I hate watching the Knicks play. If you bet against them, Earl Smith III is guaranteed to kill you with a meaningless, garbage time, bullshit 3 at the end of the game. If you take the Knicks, Sir Earl will definitely shoot 15 contested 20 ft jumpers, making somewhere around 12% of them. No worried. Kevin Durant is here to save the day. We know KD steps his game up when he's facing another superstar. Say what you want about Carmelo Anthony, the man can score the basketball. Look for Durant to continue his scoring tear and show everyone why he, not 'Melo, is the most unstoppable scorer in the game. Of course this means that Earl Smith III will want to show everyone that Earl Smith III is the most unstoppable scorer in the game, so expect a barrage of contested J's and a third quarter benching for the Knicks inked up, socialite.
BUT NONE OF THAT MATTERS! This is an NBA 2K simulation, not a slightly thought out betting analysis!
Let's go over the first half: The Knicks came out hot and opened up with a 13-3 run to start the game. It was none other than Earl Smith III knocking down 2-4 3PT shots in the first half to go along with literally nothing else! 'Melo chipped in with an efficient 8 points and 5 rebounds on 4-5 shooting while Raymond Felton led the way with 9 points, 6 assists, 5 Big Macs, 3 rebounds and a steal.
For the Thunder, Jeremy Lamb contributed a Smithian effort of 19 points on 15 shots in 16 minutes! Lamb was 5-12 from deep as the Thunder tried to take advantage of a lackadaisical Knicks defense. Reggie Jackson (despite letting Raymond Felton's fat ass put up LeBron numbers) had 15 points and 7 assists in the first half. Kevin Durant struggled form the field going 1-4 on his way to 5 points, but was able to get his teammates involved towards the end of the half, wracking up 5 assists. Somehow, even computer simulated Scott Brooks still finds a way to let Kendrick Perkins play basketball, well done 2K. The Knicks dominated with 22 points in the paint and 23 rebounds compared to 12 and 15, respectively, for the Thunder.
HALFTIME
NYK 53-OKC 51
At the end of 3, it was NYK 76-OKC 72. Through a sheer combo of shooting tons of threes and OKC not giving the ball to Kevin Durant, the Knicks were able to get their swag meter completely filled, resulting in a 3 to end the quarter. Tim Hardaway Jr. and Earl may have switched brains at half. It was all Knicks in the fourth as Tyson Chandler scored 10 points on Computer Kendrick. With 1 minute left, KD hit a 3 to bring the game within 5, but 'Melo answered by driving and drawing a foul from Serge Ibaka. Down 7 with few options left, Reggie Jackson dribbled the ball off a screening Computer Kendrick to effectively end the game.
RAYMOND FELTON ended the game as the MVP with 15 points, 14 assists and 4 rebounds!!! Earl, who just wanted to get the fuck out of OKC and back to the strip club, chipped in 16 points on 6-11 shooting. Tyson Chandler dominated the fourth quarter on his was to a 15-10 night and 'Melo finished with 23 points, 10 boards and 3 steals.
For the Thunder, Lamb finished with 23 points and was ineffective the whole second half. Reggie Jackson added 21 points and 12 assists, but will never live down the shame of letting Raymond Felton dominate him for 48 minutes. Durant got things going late, probably a little too late. He finished with 18 points, 6 assists, 5 rebounds and 2 steals. Thabo Sefolosha was the least valuable player, putting up 3 points on 6 shots, adding 2 rebounds and a turnover in 36 minutes.
FINAL
NYK 102-OKC 93
According to 2K: Take the under (200.5) and the Knicks ML!
Check back for analysis after the real game!
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