NBA Round 2 Winners

When Catz and I rolled these picks out this morning, we realized that we picked two teams down 0-2 against two teams that were in the finals last year. Bad Choice. So instead, we're bringing back the old Dirty Picks Tongue Tornado Teaser!!! That's right, 4 picks, all teased to make you spend money on a horrible bet that won't net you a ton of money! It's one of those "How can this go wrong?! It can't!" moments here at Dirty Picks and I hope you decide to roll it and suffer as these games all take terrible turns for the worst. 

SA at POR (+11.5) (OVER 199) (L) (WINNER!)
You know what they say, when you are on top you can afford to take a couple of chances. That's why the Seahawks can take players in the draft that no one has ever heard of, that become legitimate NFL players. Success increases your ability to take risks. I think this is the last hurrah for the Blazers, this is a terrible matchup for them and the Spurs have been wrecking their shit hole in these first two games. But tonight I think the Blazers feed off the energy of the undoubtedly stoned fan base and pull of the miracle win, only to lose the next two after this. It's been fun though Portland! Also both teams can score, 199 is way too low not to go over.


MIA at BK (+12) (OVER 178) (WINNERx2!)
Well there's not much to say here. I am in no way, shape or form going to all of a sudden pick against the Nets as they head home with their assholes against the wall! These teams payed 4 very close games this regular season, 3 of which were decided by 2 points or less and one which went into OT. I expect the Nets to use their Russian Magic to come up with a win tonight, but I'm too scared to take the money line. Are the Heat really going to win 8 playoff games in a row?! Is that what we're saying!? Well, that's not exactly a crazy feat seeing as they have gone 5-1 or better through their first 6 playoff games since the Heatles came together. Come on, roll with me on this one and watch as Paul Pierce does some crazy shit he shouldn't still be able to do. Oh and Deron Williams, you are quickly turning into Roy Hibbert: Point Guard Edition. Stop being so fat and fucking worthless that a guy that almost had his leg amputated has to play all your minutes! You were once compared to Chris Paul and one of the 8 most valuable players in the NBA! Get your shit together before KG starts eyeballing your wife, and at this point you should let him! Maybe it will inject some life into his decrepit body or at least make him realize he needs to retire mid-series! When Alan Anderson is more productive than you, it's time to hang it up Kevin Garnett. Now that I've said all that, make sure you take the Heat and the over, as someone may go off tonight.