2015 NFL Draft

NFL INVESTMENT PORTFOLIO

2015 NFL Draft

Instead of rolling out the typical generic mock drafts that become so popular this time of year, DP decided to go in a different direction with our prognostication. Imagine you had 100k to invest in the six elite prospects of this years NFL draft. How would you allocate it in order to maximize your return on investment? Would you go heavy in a risky stock hoping that they pay off would be worth the risk? Or would you spread it out evenly with risk/safe, hoping to make a decent amount, not necessarily an early retirement nest egg? Lets find out.

The B. Catz Retirement Fund

$25K- Jameis Winston
We get it started with a pretty decent amount of risk. This investment could be akin to taking a stack of money and lighting it on fire if he gets arrested halfway during his rookie season which is what most are expecting it seems. On the other hand, this dude could be the next face of the NFL and his off the field issues could be remembered and laughed about the same way we laugh that Brett Favre was an alcoholic for the first five years of his career (HAHAHA, alcoholism!). I am definitely on the side of people are way too concerned with his off the field issues, and don't pay enough attention to the way he carried Florida State for the better part of two years, especially in second half and crunch time. Famous Jameis is going to live up to the moniker and this return alone could set me up for the foreseeable future. 

$25K- Leonard Williams
Safest player in the draft right?? How could you possibly go wrong with an investment like this?? Easy, dudes bust in the draft all the time!! Every year someone gets tabbed as the "safest pick", and then ends up out of the league three years later, or even worse does just enough to stay on a team, but never lives up to the initial hype. Remember Glenn Dorsey? HE WAS A MONSTER IN COLLEGE!! Used to eat up double teams like it was a fresh packed bowl at a Cypress Hill concert! What happened to him? He's a solid NFL D-lineman. Definitely never lived up to his top five billing, but he can play in the league. The NFL is a tough league to succeed in, and even though scouts are doing better with each advance in technology, it is by no means a flawless system. So I am going to invest in the "safe pick" but I am not going to bet my entire retirement on it. 

$50K- Kevin White
Here it is Ladies and Gentlemen!!! The pick out of the top six "elite prospects" that I believe has the highest potential return on investment. I'll be completely honest, two months ago I had no idea who Kevin White was. All I knew was that a few mock drafts had him going to my New York Jets squad with the sixth overall pick. Then I started to get the cold sweats when I heard some of the knocks being tossed around about him. Combine wonder, late bloomer, tons of potential. Not exactly the type of words that inspire you to invest half your bank roll on right?? Then I watched his tape. DUDE IS A MONSTER! Absolute nightmare matchup who reminded me of a mix of Terrell Owens and Larry Fitzgerald! He's tall, fast, and catches the ball with his hands away from his body!! A more recent comparison could be made that he's the next Alshon Jeffrey who 31 out of 32 teams would absolutely love to have (the one who wouldn't is Jacksonville because they have no idea what the fuck they are doing). I think this guy is a pro bowl WR from the moment he steps on the field. He might not put up the numbers that others could because most likely the team that gets him will be struggling at QB, but much like Sammy Watkins in Buffalo, you will still notice that he's on the field. To me this is the safest pick in the draft, and definitely the one who offers the highest potential ROI. Can't wait till the Jets pair him with Brandon Marshall, pick up Bryce Petty in the third round and throw their way to a top five offense for the 2016 season!!

Mr. Nutz's "All your nutz in 3 baskets" Mutual Fund

$30K - Leonard Williams

I can definitely hitch my wagon to the Leanord Williams wagon train! The man was beastly during college and at this point analysts are just looking for ways to shit on him. He's going to cause a lot of problems on the interior line with his explosiveness, and a lot of people are going to be suprised at his pass rush game. I'm not saying he's going to be JJ Watt, but h's definitely going to be one of the few defensive lineman that can play any down situation and have a presence. As long as he stays healthy, he will have a long run in the NFL, and I'll be a rich man. 

$20K - Todd Gurley

This is a tough call because Gurley is coming off a major injury. In this case, you would have to assume that you are paying half the amount as say Leonard Williams or Kevin White; so if Gurley does hit, your making a ton of money. One of my finest gambling moments came last year in Vegas for the opening weekend of college football. Gurley single handedly won me a c-note and from then on I was a huge fan. He reminds me a ton of Marshawn Lynch, but a little shiftier. Gurley could come in and make a big impact immediately and I think he will be the best first round RB taken since Adrian Peterson. 

$50K - Amari Cooper

This is my Ace in the Asshole. Cooper is a bad ass wide receiver and that's what I'm hanging my hat on. He proved it on the big stage with Bama throughout his career, often going up against some of the nastiest defenses in the nation. He may not be as flashy as Kevin White, but when you throw the ball to him, he's going to catch the fucker. His ability to track the deep ball and fearlessness going over the middle will make him a star in this league. Even if he gets stuck with a shitty QB to start, he'll always have potential to live on.