NHL Picks

Tuesday Night Super Slam

Dallas @ Boston (-165)

I can’t pick against the Bruins at home when they’re playing a team that lost to Buffalo 3 days ago.  Boston has won 9 out of their last 13 games, including wins over Tampa, NYR, NYI, and Dallas.  With Tuuka in net you can expect Dallas to have a hard time scoring on the Bruins.

Ottawa (-180) @ Buffalo

Buffalo has won 3 out of their last 23 games.  

Edmonton @ NY Islanders -1.5 (-110)

Oilers are coming off a win in Jersey, meaning they’re due for a loss.  After a little rough patch, the Islanders seem to be getting things back on track.  A game against Edmonton is the perfect confidence booster for any team.

OVER/UNDER Pick: OVER 5.5 (+110)

NY Rangers (-145) @ Toronto

After 11 straight losses, the Leafs exploded for 5 goals against the Oilers and came away with a 5-1 win 3 days ago.  Is this a sign that things are turning around in Toronto?  No.  The Rangers are not the Oilers.  Even without Lundqvist in net the Rangers are a highly skilled team.  I think the Leafs will be back on the losing trail tonight and the fans will back to booing.

Anaheim (-110) @ Florida

Florida has been playing very well lately don’t get me wrong. Their last 3 games include wins over NYI and LA and a shootout loss to Smashville.  They aren’t as bad a team as their record shows.  The Ducks are just a different animal.  The only way the Panthers stand a chance in this one is if Luongo stands on his head.  Since I don’t particularly like Luongo, I don’t think that will happen.  

Arizona +1.5 (-115) @ Saint Louis

The Yotes just pulled off a huge upset in Chi-town last night.  Tonight I’m putting my money on them to repeat against another Western Conference power, the Blues.  (Or at least keep it within 2 goals)

Tampa @ Smashville

The event of the night!  Stamkos and the Boltz head to the Music City in a potential Stanley Cup final match up against Pekka Rinne and the Predators.  This is one of those games that could go either way decisively.  Both teams are going to get a bunch of great opportunities.  The winner is just going to be the team that converts on those chances more.  

OVER/UNDER Pick:  OVER 5.5 (+105)

Trashy Tuesday picks

Catz:
MIL +10 at OKC
I read an article earlier this morning about how Jason Kidd forced the Bucks to take daily tests over various basketball related things. Meanwhile Westbrook and Durant are putting together their post game outfits. And while the talent of OkC might win this game in the end, the Bucks are way too prepared to be getting ten points.

BJ
TOR (+6) at CLE
The Raptors may be without talented two-guard Super Demario Derozan, but they are certainly not out of the running to be the East's top team. The Raps have maintained their high scoring offense thanks to the likes of Lou Williams, Kyle Lowry and a host of role players, such as Patrick Patterson,  stepping up. Let's not forget, this roster is well put together! These guys know how to play with each other and the Cavs, despite playing a few good games recently, still need to work out some kinks. Kyle Lowry is going to make Kyrie play like Raymond Felton, so expect a frustrated LeBron to stand on the perimeter most of the night like a confused duck in heat. 

POR (-8) at DET
For all this talk about the 76ers being terrible, the Pistons HAVE to be the most disappointing team of the year. They have 3 wins and haven't won a game in over 3 weeks!!! Now they have been able to keep it close, but these guys have a veteran, highly touted coach, a roster full of highly regarded talent and a goal of making the damn playoffs!! At this point they need to make some trades, start accumulating picks and plan for the future. Portland on the other hand has been as consistent as ever. Lamarcus Aldridge is once again killing it and with Dame Lillard back in form, the Blazers should contend for the 2 or 3 seed out West. Side note: Can you imagine if this team had been in LA over the last few years? We would be talking about Aldridge as a LOCK for the HOF, Lillard as the most dynamic point guard in the league, Wes Matthews would be defensive player of the year somehow! Expect the determined and just plain better Blazers to win by 50 at least. 


NHL by El Sugaro

Philadelphia @ Columbus (-125)

Columbus heads into tonight with 3 straight wins under their belt.  Philly has been making headlines for all the wrong reasons; they can't win, their GM hates their players, and the coach is pissed off. Basically the triple play death combo for any organization. Columbus rolls at home tonight and keeps the streak going.

Chicago -1.5 (+150) @ New Jersey

Chicago has been on fire. 5-0 in their last 5 games, scoring 19 goals and only giving up 7.  They're dominating right now. They should have no problems with the Devils tonight.  

Los Angeles @ Buffalo (+175)

Once again the Kings are an average hockey team.  This seems to be their mean location.  Every couple of years they surge to the top at the right time but always fall back to the middle.  I like the Sabers at home here.

Calgary (+110) @ Toronto

Like Mitt Romney or the 12 gauge sitting in my closet, Calgary on the road just feels right to me. 

Vancouver (+105) @ Montreal

Montreal is slipping while Vancouver is hanging in there in a brutal West battle.  If Cryin Ryan is in net for the Nucks tonight consider it game over.  Canucks on the road.

Washington @ Tampa (-180)

The Caps are a couple losses away from being just straight garbage. Tonight will be one of those losses.

Smashville (-160) @ Colorado

Smashville is on their game right now.  Colorado is tanking like the 76ers.  All that talk of MacKinnon being the next Crosby sure did die out quickly... Where ya at Avs fans? Nashville is going to go Smashville on Colorado. 

CFB Champ Picks

While most of you are snuggled up with your spouses/slampieces/pets/inflatable Santa fetish dolls, 33% of the Dirty Picks staff is up researching college football bangers to win you some Crimmus money! That's right, college football conference championship week is upon us and I think it's about time DP gets involved in the is playoff debacle. Now don't get me wrong, the college playoff is a great idea. Not only has the top 4 discussion been fun this year, but at the end of the season, we're finally going to end up with a winner! I know what ya'll are thinking, "But there's a winner every year!" NO! That's wrong! Every year we have someone play in the BCS Title game and at the end of the day we crown them as #1, based on polls and votes and some other communist shit. But what was the point of playing all the games? I mean, basically teams played games which we would then allow us to argue about who the better winner was! This year, there is at least a false sense of a rightful champion and I am happy with that. So let's hop into it and make some gambling predictions for Saturday ball.


Iowa St. (+35) @ TCU
I really like TCU! They have an exciting QB, a smart coach and they don't play defense! Plus they have a very original mascot and color scheme! Now this isn't a conference championship game, so let's not get all excited about the big spread. Iowa St. suckz this year due to injuries and just being Iowa St. They are allowing almost 20 more points than they are scoring and really don't have a shot in this game. BUT, the committee voted the Horny Toadz into the title game (ahead of the defending national champs) and for that reason alone, I think the the Thundercatz (that's Iowa St. right?) keep this one super close! What will the committee do if TCU only wins by 5?! That's right, it's way more fun to root for chaos. ROLL IT!

Florida St. (-4) at Georgia Tech
So here's a little issue. The gambling world has expanded with the internet. Now any hack group of super cool friends can get together and start a gambling blog with a questionable name and give out picks. We all can identify "trap games" and other suspicious spreads. Last night, it was the Cavs getting points against the Raptors. When Bobby Catz saw that spread he rolled it immediately! Why? Because of all the reverse psychology in gambling now (I don't know this, we just talked about it). You see, the public is so in tune with gambling and the science of the spread now, that we think we can outsmart Vegas. No, that doesn't work. So while most folks are saying "Cavs getting points? Vegas is tricking us, go the other way" we are saying, "Cavs getting points? Vegas is tricking people into taking the Raps" and BOOOOOOOM! Catz gets another notch on the old NBA belt. Good for him. So today, the Noles are playing G Tech and EVERYONE is on Tech. I mean, Florida St. has sucked all year, barely won, hardly covers just got dropped to 4th in the playoff. Tech covers most of their spreads and could win this outright! Take #1 overall pick Jameis "Bering Sea Bandit" Winston and the best team in the country and you'll be happy.

NBA HUMP DAY

NBA Record: 13-11


Catz:

CLE (-6) vs. UTAH
This is a sucker bet. Vegas wants to watch the news all day and say yeah the talking heads are right, Cleveland is gonna struggle tonight in anti-sin city. Nope. Not gonna happen, Cavs have a big night and shut the masses up at least for another day.

MEM (+1.5) vs. PHX
Hate to do this, but they gave me no choice! Phoenix barely scrapped by the Lakers last night almost blowing a twenty point lead, and what do they have waiting in their barn? The two headed monster of Z-bo and Big Spain. This is going to be an ugly night for the Suns.

BJ

BOS @ TOR (+1.5, OVER 204)
The Celtics have played the second fastest pace in the NBA this year and I don't expect that to stop. They are employing the Phoenix style 3 guard lineup at times and like to run in transition. Meanwhile, any half good post player can dominate the garbage they trot out down low. Expect the Raps to give up some points, but score a ton to win this one. 

ATL @ SA (OVER 201)
Easy money! ATL's Budenholzer comes from the Pop coaching tree and he uses the Spurs default offense with a 3 pointer heavy twist to overcome their talent deficiencies. Two good teams that can get shots up efficiently should provide for an entertaining game and a high scoring one.

NBA Opening Night

NBA Opener

BJones

Dallas Mavericks (+3.5) at San Antonio (OVER 203)

Oh yeah! The NBA is back! While the MLB season just won't die, we can all move on to a real sport. We have college football, the NFL and NBA to make bank on, so let's start with the defending champs. When gambling on the Spurs, remember two things: Greg Popovich doesn't care about you or your family and take the over. The Spurs, no matter what lineup they trot out, will score 100 points. Tonight, The Pop Dog has Kawhi, Patty and Tiago sitting. It is also the night the Spurs get their rings and celebrate their title. Well guess what? Pop doesn't give a fuck. Sit everybody, trot out some scrubs and keep it competitive. Dirk and the fellas should be able to win this one comfortably with Kawhi out. 

Orlando Magic at New Orleans Pelicans (-9.5) (UNDER 191)

Oh God I don't know how many of you guys watch Wrasslin' but this is the equivalent of a Divas match. You think you're in for a great night of wrasslin, maybe you have a Cena match, or Randy Orton in there *BOOM!!* they hit you with a women's match right in the middle. Don't get me wrong, the Pellies are a legit team. They would be a top 4 seed in the East and will win at least 40 this year. The Magic on the other hand, are gross. They have a bad coach and no star player. No one can shoot, which means they have to take the ball to the rack on Anthony "MVP" Davis. Don't bother watching this boring ass blowout unless you want to see what a 35-14-5-4 looks like from one of the best in the L.

Houston Rockets at Los Angeles Lakers (+7) (OVER 207)

The Rockets can put up the points, the Lakers just suck. Pick the Rockets here right? NOPE. Everyone is on the Rockets, you know it, I know it, Vegas knows it. The Lake Show are trotting out a garbage ass roster with Kobe at the center. A very pissed off Kobe who just got shit on for 2 weeks straight. He will be defended by James Harden, a man so put off by defense that I can't even think of a "skanky college chick that is easy to score" joke. I expect an inefficient 28 from Ice Kobe tonight, and a nice revenge game from Jeremy Lin as the Lakers come back in garbage time to cover.  

Monday Night Madness

WAS (+10.5) AT DAL under 49.5 

When I approached a random Asian man on the street and asked him what his favorite football team was, he screamed and yelled "Godzilla is coming!!" before sprinting off in the opposite direction. Thus proving my point that even the most casual of football fans immediately recognizes the history of the Cowboys/Redskins rivalry.  This is that classic story of two groups who can never be friends and will be mortal enemies until the end. Your classic vinegar and oil, Republicans and Democrats or Americans and the people who live in the south. Tonight though we are going to back the little brother in the 'Skins against the heavily favored 'boys. The 'boys will definitely bring their infamous running game and small pox infestation to the field as they have so many times before. This time though its the 'Skins who will be laying the trap and will pull the upset over the Boys winning this game outright!! If not you still get ten points, so keep it close 'Skins!! Also how ironic is it that Mr. Texas, Mr. All-American, Colt Fuckin McCoy is the QB for the Skins. The guy's name is COLT MCCOY!!! Colt McCoy, starting quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys is almost too perfect!!! Oh well, I guess for once the Skins will have their revenge and the sweet irony is that Colt is the one who's gonna do it.

Sugar's Lazy Ass NHL Picks

Minnesota (-105)

Montreal (-135)

Thursday NFL #FREESIMMONS

Garbage Ass NFL Thursday Game

New York Football Giants @ Washington [Expletives] -3.5 (-105)

Being the Michigan State football fan that I am made this pick easy for me. Captain Kirk is going to lead his team to victory tonight. I'm so confident I even picked up Cousins this week as my fantasy QB (since Peyton has a bye week). Did you see him last Sunday?! 420 something yards? Michigan State represent. I think Kirk Cousins is going to seize his moment and show that he can be a starting NFL QB. Washington wins by 10.

BJ's Sloppy Seconds

NYG @ WAS (OVER 46)

So here I was sitting back, being terrible at my job, and I decided I should probably throw my two cents in on what is sure to be another terrible Thursday game. The Giants are the worst team in football, we can all agree on that. They have no defensive talent (Jon Beason WAS a starting lineback! Then he got hurt!), their QB is the most overrated sports figure of the last 25 years and their coach looks like he could potentially be one of those angry, in-the-closet racist, Republicans we all hate. Well, I am with Sugar here. Kirko Cousins may not be a good QB, but he's going to beat the fuck out of the Giants tonight! You know what else? Fuck you ESPN. I could usually go to Grantland, get a good laugh out of Bill Simmons' pick column and then go bang one out in the shower. Now? Nothin. All due to some bullshit suspension that only Roger Goodell agrees with! Speaking of which, did Risque Roger set this suspension? Beucase it's another one that makes no sense relative to the offense. 3 WEEKS?!! That's more than Ray Rice was suspended for going all Ice Man Chuck Lidell on his wife! Thank God Simmons said something, because looking back, Rog has been a garbage ass commissioner his entire time in office. Not a bad commisioner like David Stern who just pissed people off, but a true fuck up. I hope the ensuing Simmons backlash helps ESPN realize they might lose some of their most talented staff.

This is why, we here at Dirty Picks are sending out an open invite to Bill Simmons! Come on and join the DP team Bill, you can say whatever you want, be a homer and enjoy our private limo.  Stop smokin that Reggie and roll with the big boys at DP. If you need us, hit us up @dirtiestpicks and we'll give you more info.

Here are some tweets regarding the #freesimmons movement from unwilling participants:

@DangerMoses: ESPN reacted more to @BillSimmons saying what everyone was thinking than @ChrisBroussard saying gay people are sinners. Classy. #FreeSimmons

@Aunderwood48: Knows it's not a free speech issue, but @BillSimmons getting suspended is "fucking bullshit" #isawthetape #FreeSimmons #resignroger

@DanPomp32 : @espn how does @nflcommish's dick taste? Your commentators should all be wearing B&W stripes and the #NFL shield. #FreeSimmons

#FREESIMMONS

Summer Slam Sunday Picks!

SD at STL (-200) (UNDER 7, -120) (WINNER!) (L)
This should open the door for a couple parlays, as the Cards are a lock to win today with Wainwright on the ground. Despite a disappointing season, STL is still the Spurs/Patriots organization of baseball and I expect some professionalism and competitive fire as they try to hold their wild card spot. Wainwright dominates the Padres. This year he is 5-2 with a 1.20 ERA in seven starts against those Californian hippies and last year, he went 2-0 with a 1.76 ERA.

DEN (+4.5) vs. SAN FRAN (under 41.5, -110)
(WINNER! WINNER!)This is basically my “lets pile on a shitty quarterback” pick of the week. Blaine Gabbert is the back up for San Fran and he will see extensive action in the second half. The 49ers could jump out to a huge early lead and still end up losing this game by double digits, Gabbert is that awful. The expectation is Peyton won’t play more than a handful of snaps and I wouldn’t be surprised if he struggles to move the ball against the Niners. Take the under and the anti-Gabbert ML. 

Super Cup

Real Madrid (-1.5, +110) vs Sevilla over 3 goals (-155) (WINNER, L)

Soccer is back!!! Even better, the new and improved Real Madrid takes the field tonight looking to add some hardware to their collection before the season gets in to full swing in a couple of weeks. I know what you are asking yourself, but how can you call Real Madrid new and improved? I mean isn’t this the team that features Gareth Bale, Cristiano Ronaldo and Karim Benzema up front in their attack?? It sure is, and the rich got richer by signing World Cup sensations Toni Kroos and HUMMUS (James) Rodriguez, who are scheduled to make their debut with Los Blancos today! And what a perfect team to showcase all of their newly acquired talent in La Liga rival Sevilla, but this is not the same Sevilla team that earned the right to play in this game. This team is not nearly as good as the one they trotted out six months ago, but the fact that they are familiar with Real means this one shouldn’t be a complete blowout. Don’t let that stop you from betting the house though, all indications are Real is solely focused on winning this cup and getting the season off to a solid start. Look for goals from HUMMUS and Ronaldo as Real easily cruises to a 4-1 or 5-0 type victory. 

Wednesday Sports Picks

World Cup Semi-Finals Pick

Netherlands (P) vs Argentina (OVER 2) (P)(L)

BJ: Somehow Argentina has scratched and clawed their way to the Final Four, despite playing like an African rec league team 80% of the time. Without Messi saving their asses, the 'Tinas would have been out in the group stage, while their opponent today, have not lost a game and have looked dominant at times. The Dutch will be able to control the "attacking" 'Tinas today and should be able to counter for at least two goals. 'Tinas defense is looser than Lindsey Lohan's butthole, so I see no reason why Arjen Robben and RVP won't be able to bang a couple home. Take the Netherlands and watch a complete team send Messi and the Mexicans  Argentinians home today.

Major League Baseball Picks

BJ

MIA (+1.5) at ARI (WINNER!)

Come on! The DBacks aren't good! They're like one of the 5 worst teams in baseball! This is just one you can toss in a parlay, because I usually end up on the right side of this Marlin Misnomers. 

SD (+1.5) at COL (L) 

You know those pitchers that come up and dominate for one year and then fade away for 6 or 7 years only to come back and finish up as a set up man for the Yankees? You know, the Dontrelle Willis' and Ubaldo Jimenez's of the world? Well Colorado's starting pitcher tonight, Jair Jurrjens is one such pitcher.  Once the third best prospect in baseball, Colorado is set to be a reddeming location for the 28 year old righty. Jurrjens was once an All-Star and one of the best young pitchers in the game, but injuries have derailed all that shit. He's still not "back" yet, the 'Dres should be able to take advantage. Roll it!

Sugar

LA Dodgers @ Detroit Tigers (-115) (WINNER!)

Last night Detroit put on a hitting clinic for LA. Some guy named Greinke will be on the mound for the Dodgers tonight so Los Tigres probably won't be putting up 14 runs again. However, the best pitcher on the planet, Max Scherzer, will be on the mound for Detroit. It should be a low scoring affair but since Detroit has arguably the best hitter to ever play (Miguel Cabrerra) I'm going with the boys from Detroit here.

Washington Natty Ice (+105) @ Baltimore Oreos(WINNER!)

Doug Fister is on the mound for the Natty's tonight. He seems like a good guy, family oriented and all that, throws fast as fuck. So I'm going with the Nationals. 

Minnesota Twins @ Seattle Mariners (L)

UNDER 7.5 (-125)

This just seems to be free money every game the Mariners play. They can't score, Minnesota can't score, no one can fucking score. Definitely going under. 

World Cup

2014 World Cup Picks

Group H

Belgium (-1) (-185) vs. Algeria

Catz: The Belgium men's national soccer team makes their Brazil debut today as they take on a country apparently called "Algeria". What I thought was an allergy medicine is actually a team that participates in the World Cup; instead of known countries like China or India. Either way it does not really matter what "eria" the Belgians are playing today because this team is gonna roll. They are very talented and led by stand out players Vincent Kompany and Eden Hazard. Belgium went second in our World Cup fantasy snake draft and no one even questioned the decision. Don't be surprised if everyone is talking about Belgium today after they win this one convincingly, 4-0!

Russia (-140) vs South Korea (Over 2)

BJ: Do I know anything about these two teams? Of course I do! Russia is the better team here folks, there's not much to it. I expect a 2-1 or 3-1 victory from the Putin All-Stars. I also expect all of their players to look like Ivan Drago from Rocky, and if you've seen that man, then you know exactly why I've picked them to destroy the tiny South Korean team. CSKA Moscow midfield Alan Dzagoev should be on the board within minutes, so go pour yourself a nice vodka cran, step outside and smell the freedom.

Free Sunday Picks

NBA Picks

SA (+2.5) at OKC (OVER 208) (L)(L)

I know that people are saying this series is over and that the Thunder are DONE and need to figure things out in the offseason. Well the series definitely isn't over (remember down 0-2 a couple years ago?) and never trust the Thunder to make smart moves to better their team. The Spurs have been rolling lately thanks to the usual ball movement and insane 3 point shooting they are capable of at home. Now they will be on the road with Serge Ibaka back in the lineup. That means less minutes for the Spurs to absolutely abuse Kendrick Perkins on the pick and roll. With Ibaka, Westbrook and Durant, the Thunder will have all the athleticism they need to close out on shooters and switch on screens. Even though Tim Duncan is amazing, he isn't the go to, sure thing on the block scorer he used to be. So when those switches do happen, the Spurs really don't create huge mismatches. I expect this one to be close and a HUGE Westbrook game as the Thunder feed off the energy and win by 2. This time tomorrow, all the assholes in the media will be asking, "Guys, are the Spurs in trouble here?" No, dammit, they're fine. 

WNBA Picks

Since BJ is handling tonight's NBA game, I decided not to leave my loyal readers wondering what happened to the Catz! Here are two WNBA games guaranteed to finish off your weekend strong.

IND (+7.5) at ATL(WINNER!)
These two played recently and the Atlanta squad ended up pulling out a victory in double OT. Well I think that Indy has just enough in the tank to be able to keep this one close, possibly even get their first win of the season on the road.

SA (+9) at LA (L)
Before you come after me on the twitter over this one, think twice about the San Antonio team. They really aren't that bad, and even though LA has MVP candidate Candace Parker playing out of her mind, don't be surprised if this SA team (and the other one) get a victory on the road in LA.

NHL Pick

Montreal @ New York (-180) (WINNER!)

Montreal snuck out a big win last game to make this series a little interesting. I think tonight will be a different story. The Rangers at home with the chance to take a commanding 3-1 series lead, that's tough to pass on. I'm going Rangers. 

NFL DRAFT NBA PLAYOFF PICKS!

Today is one of the most anticipated days to anybody who is a die-hard NFL fan. Unfortunately if you are a fan of the New York Jets, today can be  particularly rough day. Do yourself a favor and google New York Jets draft blunders, its only 1:30 and it is absolutely hilarious. My personal favorite part is where the entire crowd of Jets fans is chanting "We want Sapp, we want Sapp!!" towards the future Hall of Famer DT, only to have their nuts ripped out with the selection of Kyle Brady from Penn State. You know that you have a terrible front office, when the crowd knows how to draft better than they do. Either way there is always a tremendous amount of hope today, and it should be a great day. Now on to the NBA picks!

BKN at MIA (-7.5) (UNDER 192) (WINNERx2)

Last game the Heat came out and showed why they are the two time defending champs and why they have a good shot at making it three in a row. The real concern for the Nets in this game? LeBron did not even play that well (for LeBron) in the first game. He has figured out exactly what he needs to do in order to give his team the win, and the rest of the league should be absolutely terrified. Every other contender is struggling to get through their match-ups while all the Heat are doing is going 5-0 and getting contributions from across the board. LeBron and the Heat roll in this one and their defensive presence keeps this game under 192 points combined. 

POR at SA (-6.5) (OVER 208) (WINNERx2)

This game will be a little closer than last time. Honestly, the Spurs might take it easy this game and try to keep their starters around 34 minutes. If they start fast and jump out to a 10 point lead at half, I think Pop puts his foot on the gas and tries to end this in the third quarter. These teams play too many possessions for this thing to go under, so be comfortable their. 

Wednesday Mid-Week Weekend NBA Picks!

NBA Picks

BJ's Three Team Teaser of the Week (L)

The NBA struggle around here has been real. We've lead a lot of people astray with our picks and have been trying everything to get the stench off! Well, when it comes down to it, we just need to ease back into this thing with easy picks and teasers. Yeah I know they aren't as lucrative as throwing together a fat parlay and sweating out every win, but they are nearly guaranteed. Tonight, I'm rollin 3 teams out in a nice 8 point (-110) teaser. 

Toronto (-3.5, teased to +4.5) at Boston (Winner!)

Denver at San Antonio (-13.5, teased to -5.5) (L)

Memphis at Utah (UNDER 184 teased to 192) (Winner!)

The Raptors had a rough one last night, but they should bounce back just fine against an up and down Boston team. Denver just sucks, and they made a dumb ass coaching hire, so they're definitely getting blown out. And the Grizz might hold Utah to 65 points tonight, so don't bother watching that game. 

Bob's NBA Teaser (L)

Tonight we are rolling out a two team five point teaser that will make the payout (-130). Both of these games will be incredibly entertaining and will give you something to keep on eye on while watching Heat/Pacers round three.

BKN (+7.5) at CHA (Winner!)
Every time this year I've been betting against the Nets I have gotten burned harder than that time I went to Thailand. Well tonight we put a little penicillin on that burn and back the Nets for once. Look for a huge night from D-Will, Truth, and Plumlee (!!) as the Catz keep this one close in the first half, but slowly fade away in the fourth.

NO at LAC (-2.5) (L)

Anthony Davis has not only been playing like one of the best players in the league lately, he's been playing like an all-time great. His numbers in just his second year are very similar to those of Tim Duncan in his second year. Not saying that he's gonna go down as one of the best power forwards of all time, but the sky is definitely the limit for this young Pelican. With all of that being said the Clippers are the better team right now. Look for Blake and CP3 to have a big night exploiting the Pelicans on nonstop pick and rolls as they roll to a 10-15 point win.

Wet Walrus Wednesday NHL Picks

Sugar’s NHL Picks

Tampa (-125) @ Toronto (WINNER!)

I’m not really sure why people are betting on Toronto to win this, because they won't.  Tampa is a more skilled team and has one of the best scorers to ever live, Steven Stamkos.  I don’t see Toronto doing much in this one.  Bolts roll on the road.

Sugar’s Pick: Tamps +1.5

Saint Louis (+1.5) @ Chicago (L)

Chicago is a great team but so is Saint Louis.  The spread is a solid bet as it will probably be a 1 goal game.  Look for Oshie to bury a couple and the Blues to win; if not they will cover.

Sugar’s Pick: Saint Louis +1.5

Colorado (-120) @Winnipeg (L)

Colorado lost tonight but I don’t expect it become a trend for the Avs.  Look for Colorado to go into Winnipeg and do work.  Their offense is highly skilled and can score easily.  Winnipeg play tight and try to keep the game low scoring.  Expect the Avs to roll.

Sugar’s Pick: Colorado -120

Saturday Succubus Picks

Saturday NBA Picks

BK @ WAS (+3) (WINNER!)
I love that the media and the public are all over the Brooklyn Nets nowadays. Somebody pleases tell me why I should have any faith in a team that is barely floating above .500 in the Weakstern Conference? The Wiz are going through a rough patch right now and this is just what they need to get back into the late season swing. Washington has beat these guys twice already and with the opportunity to snap out of a funk, I see the Wiz going off tonight to the tune of 109 as they dominate the JKidd's. 

IND (-5.5) at DET (WINNER!)
The Pacers have really been struggling to put teams away lately and have failed to look like the team that appeared to be title favorites early in the season. Luckily for them a great confidence builder for any team is to play the Detroit Pistons. The Pistons have a really big front line in Smith, Drummond, and Monroe; unfortunately for them that means J Smoove plays the 3 and finds himself with the ball in his hands near the three point line consistently. Smoove is literally on pace to have one of the worst 3 point shooting seasons of all time. Look for the Pacers to pack the paint and force the Pistons into jumpers leading to open run outs for George and Stephenson helping them get a big lead early and cruise to a 15 point win.

DEN (+6) at ATL (WINNER!)
The Hawks are trying to lose their grip on the 8th seed in what is the most unappealing playoff race of all time. The Nugs are playing better lately and the return of Ty Lawson has turned a nonexistent offense into a barely serviceable one. Also recently Coach Shaw gave Chandler Wilson the green light to carry the team and he has responded well. Look for the Lawson-Chandler combo to keep this one close throughout with a decision coming by 2-4 points.

Conference Tourney Picks

ARIZ (-5.5) at UCLA (L)
The Wildcats are going to stomp out the Bruins in this game because of two factors. One, the Catz have lottery pick Aaron Gordon who has the potential to be an NBA star in the not so distant future, while the Bruins have surefire lottery bust Zach Lavine on theirs. Side note when I looked up on NBAdraft.net and saw the player comp for Lavine as Russell Westbrook I almost shit my pants, why do scouts love to overhype this prospects?!?!?(Also check out our upcoming article for more breakdowns of the prospects in this years drafts). The second factor contributing to tonight's Catz blowout is the recent play of Arizona against teams they have previously struggled with. Two blowouts of Utah, and Colorado have the Catz ready to roll tonight in Vegas against the Bruins.


UCONN (+7.5) at LVILLE (L)
This is the crazy Catz pick of the night!! Last time these two teams played the Huskies found themselves getting routed by the defending national champs in an embarrassing road loss. Well this Husky team not only has pride, but they are also on a bit of a hot streak lately. Couple that with the fact that Russ Smith went 7-9 from deep yesterday and you could see how he might come back down to earth tonight. Louisville probably wins this game, but I expect the Huskies to keep this one close well into the closing minutes losing by 3-4 points.

NHL Picks

Sugar’s “Thug Mansion Thursday” Picks

Colorado (+1.5) @ Detroit (WINNER!)

Anyone who knows me knows the psychological damage writing this pick is doing to me.  If you haven’t figured it out, I’m a Wings’ fan.  Part of the everyday life of being a Wings’ fan, that grew up in the 1990’s, is hating the Colorado Avalanche with every ounce of your being.  The dark days in Denver are, unfortunately, over.  The Avs no longer sit on the bottom of the NHL. They have assembled a young, star studded, high

ly competitive hockey club.  Detroit is looking weak without Zetterberg and Datsyuk.  Legawand was a great pick up… said no Wings’ fan ever.  Unfortunately, injuries put Detroit in a situation where they had to take any center they could get their hands on and the old and busted up, Legwand, was all they could get yesterday. Look for Colorado to come into Hockeytown and send the fans home early.

Sugar’s (regretful) Pick: Colorado +1.5

Los Angeles (-130) @ Winnipeg (WINNER!)

LA rolls in to Winnipeg on a 5 game win streak.  Winnipeg is 2-3 in their last 5 and will not be making any magic happen tonight.  LA is a more talented team from top to bottom.  Look for the Kings to roll on the road tonight and defeat the Jets.

Sugar’s Pick: Los Angeles -130

Columbus @ Chicago (-195) (WINNER!)

This is my gimme pick for you rookies out there.  Columbus  is the NHL version of junior hockey teams in Alaska.  Players end up there when they either fuck up real bad or play like shit for an extended period of time.  When good clubs get sick of putting up with an ego or they are just sick of watching a guy play like the Pillsbury Dough Boy, they ship them up to Columbus and take whatever they can get for them.  Meanwhile, Chicago has evolved into one of the premier clubs of the league.  They have a captain who’s “player comp” (sorry bobcat) coming into the league was Steve Yzerman.  Any time someone compares you to Stevie Y, you’re doing something right.  The game is in Chicago and the Hawks will roll over the Jackets.

Sugar’s Pick: Chicago -195

NHL Picks

Sugar’s Puck Picks of the Day

San Jose (-135) @ New Jersey (WINNER!)

Okay my bad on that last San Jose pick.  There’s literally no way I could have known that the Sabers would trade, THE two franchise of all franchise players, at the last minute.  For all you people living under a rock; the Sabers traded Captain Steve Ott and 8 year starting goalie, Ryan Miller, at the very last minute prior to the start of the Sharks vs Sabers game on Friday.  That game was a pride game for Buffalo and no team in the NHL, including the 2002 Red Wings, could have beat them.  Today however, the Sharknado sets its sights on the shit hole that is New Jersey. Honestly, is Brodeur still alive? Or are the Devils orchestrating some sort of “Weekend at Bernie’s” type of deal? It really wouldn’t surprise me.  Their leading scorer, Jaromir Jagr, is FORTY-THREE years old; yes that’s a 4 and a 3.  And their best goaltender is FORTY-ON E years old, with a 4 and a 1.  I’m sorry but is this still the NHL? Like the mo fuckin league of all leagues for hockey? New Jersey is going to look like Tara Reid; not knowing what to do about the Sharknado, tomorrow night.  Look for Thorton and Marleau to go to work against the Devils.

Sugar’s Pick: San Jose -135

Carolina @ Anaheim (OVER 5.5) (WINNER!)

My bad (again) on the Blues vs Ducks over pick.  The Canes and Ducks are going to snip show on each other all day tonight.  Trust me on this one.  Getzlaf and Staal are both good for a few goals between their line mates. Look for the Ducks to roll at home against the weaker Hurricanes.

Sugar’s Pick: OVFER 5.5

NHL Picks

Sugar’s NHL Picks of the Day

Phoenix @ Colorado (-165) (WINNER!)

Phoenix struggled to shut the door on Winnipeg last night and it ended up costing them the win.  Tonight they head into Denver to face a much more talented club.  Colorado is coming off a 6-4 loss to LA on Wednesday.  Look for the Avs to bounce back hard tonight and bury the Yotes.  They sit in 3^rd place in arguably the toughest division in the league; the Central Division. A Win against Phoenix would put them 3 points behind St. Louis and Chicago (tied at 84 pts).  I went with the money line on this one because I have a feeling it will end up being a 1 goal game in favor of Colorado. 

Sugar’s Pick: Colorado (-165)

Minnesota (+1.5) @ Vancouver (WINNER!)

The Wild head into Vancouver coming off a 3-0 win against the Oilers.  The Canucks beat Saint Louis on Wednesday 1-0, meaning they’re due for a loss.  Vancouver has been anything but consistent this season and I predict they lose to Minnesota tonight.  Either way, the Wild should cover.

Sugar’s Pick: Minnesota (+1.5)

Saint Louis @ Anaheim (OVER 5.5) (L)

This game features two of the highest scoring teams in the NHL this season.  With Saint Louis coming off a 1-0 loss to Vancouver look for them to go off tonight.  Both these teams average 3.2-3.3 goals per game.  So on their average night they push this game over 5.5.  With this being a potential playoff match up either in the Western Conference Finals or semifinals, look for both teams to be shooting to score.  My pick on this game is Anaheim coming away with a 5-3 win with an empty net goal.  Regardless, take the over on this game.

Sugar’s Pick: OVER 5.5  

San Jose (-1.5) @ Buffalo (L)

Buffalo has had success recently against some decent Eastern Conference teams.  If you’re one of few remaining Sabre’s fans still left on this earth (you must be an idiot), I’m sorry.  The little glimpse of winning you’ve had will come to a screeching halt tonight when the Sharks come to town.  It’s one thing to pull off a win against Carolina and slip one past Boston in overtime; and it’s an entirely different thing to take on the San Jose Sharks in the regular season.  The Sharks have made a name for themselves as being the best team that hasn’t actually won shit.  They’ll snag President’s Trophies like it’s their job but when it comes to playoffs… let’s just say they’re usually playing the back 9 at Pebble Beach after the first or second round.  With their star players getting older and the window to bring a cup to San Jose getting smaller, look for the Sharks to dominate down the stretch.  San Jose takes this game by 3 maybe 4 goals I predict.

Sugar’s Pick: San Jose -1.5

Bobby Catz is Back!

When NBA players find themselves struggling, they tend to return to the basics and simplify things. After taking a night off making my picz, I too was able to get away from the noise and focus on what got me here in the first place. In classic movie soul-searching montage; I went for a walk, fed ducks at the local pond, and even helped a blind lady cross the street. During this time I came to the realization that I had been overthinking all of these picks and not picking from the place where all great picks come from, my balls. So in honor of getting my groove back (like Stella) I will be successfully picking all five of tomorrow's NBA games.

MIL at PHI (-3) (L)
Not much thought here, the home team has won in each of the last four meetings. Look for Thaddeus Young, and MCW to roll for the Sixers.

GSW(-5) at DET (WINNER!)
The Warriors are down Andrew Bogut and David Lee, but on the bright side Jermaine O'Neal has turned back the clock. Look for the hot outside shooting of the dubs to take over this game and for the warriors to continue their hot start to the second half of the season.

LAC (-5) at NO  (WINNER!)
This one has mismatch written all over it. Pelicans struggle to put the ball in the hoop, which coincidentally is the second most important aspect of playing in the NBA (the first is tattoos). Meanwhile Lob City has been rolling lately and are getting contributions across the board. The Clips will rip and run all night in this one.

BOS at Utah (-2.5) (WINNER!)
The Butler reunion. Look for this matchup to be decided by the pupil not the teacher, as Gordon Hayward goes for 33 pts, 15 assists, 6 blocks and 13 steals. Jazz roll, rondo puts up a solid line for the celtics.

DAL (-2) at NY (P)
The Knicks have been struggling bad as of late. Melo is averaging a shit load of points (figures not exact) lately and getting no help from any of his teammates. He admitted recently that the frustration from recent losses has really been setting in lately. Now does that sound like something you want to hear from a team you are putting money on? Me either, Dirk and the Mavs tear that ass up and roll in MSG.